You have to build it from the inside. Right now you've conditioned yourself in to thinking a certain way about yourself. You just notice what's wrong with you, what you dislike, why you're not good enough. That's a way of thinking. It can be changed.

Focus on ONE thing you like about yourself physically. Maybe you have nice eyes or a nice nose or you like your hair. Focus on it and compliment it. Whenever your mind goes off on "I'd be so much better if I was skinnier..." "I'm so fat..." STOP. Think about that one feature. Move on to other features. Even if it's a total out and out lie and you think you're still the ugliest person EVER, lie to yourself and say it anyway. As much as possible. You will start believing it.

Push yourself outside your comfort zone a bit. I felt a lot better when I bought myself nicer clothes. I use to cover up in a lot of baggy stuff. I didn't find tighter stuff comfortable at first but I learned to like how I looked and put up with it. And I felt a lot better about myself. I spent a little more time on my appearance. Making sure my teeth were just a bit whiter, my hair was always washed and conditioned, etc. Little things. It all adds up.

Learn to talk to people too. Don't shy away. I pushed myself to talk to anyone and now I'm a lot more comfortable in social situations. It may start with just being able to ask a stranger for the time. It works up. Practice convos with people in your head. Have "fall back" lines so you don't get the awkward silences.

Good luck.


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Holly.
Mama to Hunter Kai
Still missing you, LML. (1941-2007). ♥
"Nothing is worth more than this day."