Q. - If two BAMA football players are in the same car, who's driving?
A. - The policeman!

Q. How is the Alabama football team like a possum?
A. They play dead at home and get killed on the road.

Q. - What's the difference between BAMA's Bryant-Denny Stadium and a porcupine?
A. - A Porcupine has 83,000 pricks on the outside.

A guy is in a bar with his dog, watching the Auburn vs. Alabama game. Alabama surprisingly manage to get a field goal and the dog barks repeatedly. The bartender looks at the dog in awe. After a while Alabama scores a touchdown and the dog does flips and dances across the bar. Then, the bartender looks at the guy and says, "Man, that's amazing. What does your dog do when Alabama beats Auburn?" The guy replied, "I dunno, I've only had him 5 years."

Q. - What's the best way to get a Alabama grad off your front porch?
A. - Pay him for the pizza!

Q. - Can you name one good use for an Alabama diploma?
A. - By placing it in the windshield of your car you are eligible for handicapped parking!

Q. - How do you circumcise a Crimson Tide football player?
A. - Kick his sister in the mouth!

Q. - What do you say to a BAMA athlete in a 3-piece suit?
A. - Will the defendant please rise?

Q: What is the definition of an Alabama virgin?
A: An ugly twelve year old who can outrun her brothers.

Q. How does an Alabama graduate spell VICTORY??
(Its a trick question, we all know they can't read!)

Did ya hear that the Crimson Tide Library burned down?
Burned up both books - and one of 'em wasn't even colored yet!!


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It may be true that you can't fool all the people
all the time, but you can fool enough of them to rule a
large country. -- Will Durant