Hey, This is not an uncommon fantasy to be perfectly honest. It has a lot to do with wanting to lose control, to be completely taken over by something outside yourself, to surrender completely.
Unfortunately, the reality of rape is very serious, and very degrading a way that fantasy surrender sex is not.
Try to seek out healthy relationships and good sexual situations. Do not put yourself in a situation to be unsafe or in danger, because the reality of rape is far dirtier than the image of it.
Someday, when you are in a healthy sexual relationship, you may want to explore relinquishing control and other things like that to see if it is something you just have a desire for.
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Everyone who thirsts, come to the waters; and you who have no money
come, buy and eat. Come, buy wine and milk without money and
without cost.-Isaiah 55:1
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